Welcome to all of our Foreign-based searches

I have not done this in a while, but I have noticed that very few google searches ending up here at the Playground originate within the bounds of the US of A.

Having said that I did find these search terms brought some foreign visitors over:

something in the bathroom that begins with the letter g : hmmm, just guessing but how about: Gel, Goobers, 'Gross! How did that get in the toilet?' (variants include: G--da---T! Who left the lid up?, Geezus! Somebody get me the plunger!')

wet dream pee : ummm, if your wet dreams include pee--- GROSS!
perfect world easter : Yes, that would be a perfect time to realize a perfect world.
imp’s drive info sidebar :  I'm not tellin'!
dress code for high school reunion : I don't know about your high school but Denim and Checkered Shirts with the 'ole shitkickers seemed in vogue at my school's last reunion...(well, the reunion before last because we had to cancel the last one because people thought $4o bucks a person was too steep)
mom & little oyb :  would that be mom and little boy?  I personally hope it was Oh Yes Baby! (I get that alot around here)
do me daddy : Please seek help soon...

Google Anonymity - Year 2--ish

Yes gentle reader(s), we are in near the end of our second year of blogginess and I must say that I have managed not to jeapordize my marriage to wife.imp (well, nothing too serious anyway) with my posts.


Yea Me!!

So, after two years, I must say that I have consistantly appealed to that fickle, world audience?

What proof do I have, you ask? Well the answers are right before your eyes (the graphs below represent the areas of the world from which our humble little Playground is visited):





...and these are some the search terms from the last month that brought you to 'the Playground':
"what prompts" admission: Usually asking, “please”, works here at the Playground…
bratz playground: Sorry, no bratz here; Only Imps!
bud: this from O Fallon, Missouri, hmmm, here in Ohio they still say ‘Dude’…unless asking for a cold, frothy beverage then Bud is quite often used…
imp news of day: they got up today and started playing a Memory card game that they got for Christmas! Pretty cool, huh?
mother milk: Father Whiskey? ??? OH! You guys need to get a life! Join a frat or something…
peed girl face%: What goes on in Germany (State/Region: Niedersachsen, City: Ronnenberg) stays in Germany
mouse tattoo joke: ummm, footprints meandering from the lower buttocks to the lower back??

Blog Anonymity redux redux

Location Search Term

Canada: che (?????????)
Sexy Imps (see powell, ohio below...rrrrrrrow!)
h (??????)

United Kingdom: dalek colouring (silver are the foot soldiers and black is the #1 dude, but it's gone now--killed by the other 3 members of the Order of Skaro- the question here is 'does this answer or the three following search terms disturb you folks most??')
perfect pooing position (preferably with nether regions exposed and arranged in such a manner as to not involve your lower extremities in this activity)
wet skirts (bad aim. too bad)
Boy bothering cows (i'm starting to be vaguely disturbed by my British visitors)
dream im having a pee then wet the bed (I'm told Depends are useful here)

France: Neighbors form hell 2 on vacation (there is a funny story here, isn't there?)

Powell, Ohio: keegan connor tracy oops (-90 second break while I google something-)

Douglasville, GA: abbott & Costello…herd of cows (nope, but Mike Rowe herding cows, pigs, ostrich--hell, Mike Rowe herding anything is funny!)

Columbus, OH: dog-faced imp (you poor poor dear..)

Tokyo, Japan: perfectworld?item cheat (wasn't perfect world a reality t.v. show?)

The Playground is Worldwide baby (even if we average 3 hits a week LOL)!!!

The America’s:

Central/South:
Argentina, Bueno Aires, Distrito Federal
Costa Rica, San Jos, San Jose
Mexico, Mexico City, Distrito Federal
Panama, Paitilla

North/United States:
California:
- City of Industry
- Berkeley
- Harbor City
Illinois:
- Neoga
- Greens Fork
Maryland, Annapolis
Michigan, New Baltimore
New York:
- Potsdam
- Centereach
New Mexico, Las Cruces:
New Hampshire, Goffstown
Pennsylvania, Easton
Texas:
- Sherman
- Waco
Utah, Orem

North/Canada:
- Bellville, Ontario
- Deseronto, Ontario
- Bedford, Nova Scotia
- Ingramport, Nova Scotia
- Toronto, Ontario
- Stanley Bridge, Prince Edward Island
- Calgary, Alberta
- Warman, Saskatchewan
- Lethbridge, Alberta

Europe:
Germany:
- Berlin
- Hungen, Hessen
France, Paris, lle-de-France
Germany, Schifferstadt, Rheinland-Pflaz
Italy, Rome, Lazio
Spain, Valencia, Comunidad Valencia
United Kingdom:
- Dudley, Dudley
- Willesden, Newham
- City of Bristol, Bristol
Portugal, Pontinha, Lisbo
Poland, Lublin, Chmielnik

Africa:
Egypt

Australia:
- Ryde, New South Wales
- Melbourne, Victoria

S.E. Asia:
Singapore

Search Terms:
5 seconds addicting games
fat man couch potato
Imps
imp speaks
imps waiting for what
Matt Damon, North Andover, Ma
Stick figure torture game at addictinggames.com

When One Cannot Think of Anything to Say

because wife.imp wants nothing in print that would be embarrassing...

Meaning Sex is OUT (not that talk about our sex life would be embarrassing, I know that I have no complaints aaaaaand, more to the point, I have not yet heard her complain...). Anyway I am off topic. The imps did nothing today that would be noteworthy...well blogworthy.

So I am back on my fall back position of my great, worldwide, Google Anonymity:

Germany:
- Berlin
- Hungen, Hessen: Search= 5 seconds addicting games: Dude, if you can break away from these games in 5 seconds then you are MY IDOL!

Canada:
- Bellville, Ontario
- Deseronto, Ontario
- Bedford, Nova Scotia

Costa Rica, San Jos, San Jose

Portugal, Pontinha, Lisboa: ISP Address=Centro Informatica do Exercito - I am being researched by the Portugese version of the CIA! : Search=imp speaks - Every day. And I can be heard here: www.impsplayground.blogspot.com!!

Italy, Rome, Lazio: ISP Address=Telecom Italia S.p.A. TIN EASY LITE, Search = Imps: The Church is searching out Imps on the Internet?? I am disturbed on many levels...

Australia:
- Ryde, New South Wales
- Melbourne, Victoria

Singapore: Search= imps waiting for what: ummm, i guess the usual. Halos, Forked tails, Triplets, Lottery Numbers that actually get picked by the Ping-Pong Ball spitter outer machine and not just my dreams...Did I mention triplets?

Spain, Valencia, Comunidad Valencia

Panama, Paitilla


California:
- City of Industry- No! Really? In California?? the land of fun, sun and surf?? What's next Spuds in Idaho?
- Berkeley - I am now fulfilled as a blogger!!
- Harbor City: Search= Stick figure torture game at addictinggames.com: Two things leap to mind. 1)living in a city that is essentially a harbor would drive me frackin' nuts. 2) I understand the search

Maryland, Annapolis: Hello to the Cadets!!

Pennsylvania, Easton- Cool! A city named after one of our Malls!!

New York:
- Potsdam: Search – Matt Damon, north Andover, Ma: My Matt Damon Factor is Alive and Well!!
- Centereach

New Mexico, Las Cruces: Search - fat man couch potato- thanks! have you been speaking to wife.imp? :(

The Playground's Google Anonymity - 1st Quarter 2007

Much like everybody else in the blogosphere, I wanted to see where my 'peeps' were coming from. I noticed bloggers like Cynical Dad posted lists of search terms that brought the unsuspecting to their sites. And I joined the lemming heard.

In posting the search terms (pitifully few in the case of the Playground), I decided that there were other interesting stats:
- Country/City of search origin
- How long did you actually give the Playground some luv'n??
- IP Address (for those of you searching from work...thank you and IT's OUR SECRET!!)
- Search Terms

Foriegn Imp Searches:
Those who chose not to stay and enjoy the Playground and ALL it has to offer:
Greece – Athens, Attiki, 0 seconds 1 page view
Netherlands – Utrecht, 0 seconds 1 page view, Search Term: ‘imps blogging’ - everywhere! They're like Tribbles!! buuuuwhahahaha!!!
Indonesia – Jakarta, Jawa Barat, 0 seconds 1 page view
United Kingdom: - Cheltenham, Gloucestershire, 0 seconds 1 page view (IP Address: Gloucestershire College of Arts and Technology)
- Manchester, 0 seconds 1 page view (ISP Address Manchester City Council)
- Bradford, 0 seconds 1 page view
- Hammersmith, Hammersmith and Fulham, 0 seconds 1 page view
Spain – Madrid, 0 seconds 1 page view – 3 visits
Philippines – Koronadal, South Cotabato, 0 seconds 1 page view, Search Term: ‘flying machine impormation’ - umm- have you tried the Gloucestershire College of Arts and Technology?
Canada:– Timmins, Ontario, 0 seconds 1 page view
Brazil – Mairipor, Sao Paulo, 0 seconds 1 page view
Croatia – Zagreb, Grad Zagreb, 0 seconds 1 page view

Our Worldwide Friends who stayed for a visit. Come back again!!
United Kingdom - Rochdale, Rochdale, 11 seconds 2 page view
United Arab Emirates – Dubai, Dubayy, 6 minutes 5 seconds 5 page views, Search Term: ‘imp of exercise’ - ok ok, you got me! I should be doing more!
Canada - Ottawa, Ontario, 5 seconds 2 page views
Norway – Hinna, Rogaland, 41 seconds 2 page view


USA Imp searchers that could not give the Playground any Love:
Brookline, Massachusetts – 0 seconds 1 page view, ‘imp 1 pow 14 answer’ - Sorry no cheats here!
South Dennis, Massachusetts – 0 seconds 1 page view, ‘graded school house west dennis playground disability’ - good luck with your search
Superior, Wisconsin – 0 seconds 1 page view - so...superior to what??
Hollywood, Florida – 0 seconds 1 page view - so close and yet sooo far! Correct, Tony?
Silver Spring, Maryland – 0 seconds 1 page view (IP Address: National Asphalt Pavement Association)
Evansville, Indiana – 0 seconds 1 page view, Search Term: ‘barefoot in walmart’ - ummm hopefully never again
Metairie, Louisiana – 0 seconds 1 page view
Lead Hill, Arkansas – 0 seconds 1 page view - I need to know who named this city!!
Moberly, Missouri – 0 seconds 1 page view
Dayton, Ohio – 0 seconds 1 page view, Search Term: ‘professional behavior’ - well depending on the profession, let's say that you were dancing on a stage in front of floor-to-ceiling mirrors and the stage had a pole and you spotted a $20 bill being waved...but I don't really have any idea of what I'm talking about. (really honey! I'm just running on at the mouth here)
Manhasset, New York – 0 seconds 1 page view
Jacksonville, Florida – 0 seconds 1 page view, Search Term: ‘rush hour jam addictinggames.com cheats’ - oh come on! Cheat Codes for addictinggames.com????

Imp Friends who came for a visit and enjoyed the sites:
New Lebanon, Ohio – 29 seconds 1 page view
Fort Lauderdale, Florida – 5 seconds 2 page views
Newark, Delaware – 15 seconds 2 page views
Mount Laurel, New Jersey – 5 minutes 38 seconds 1 page view
Leipsic, Ohio – 7 seconds 2 page views - Leipsic? I will google you!

Unrepentent Unrelenting Blog Anonymity

A few weeks ago I followed the trend about posting the odd Google searches that ended up on my site. Since starting this blog, I have felt blessed to associate with the 3-6 people that occassionally stumble through our Playground.

However, today I have to admit that I am...



...WORLDWIDE BABY!!!

Yessireebob!

Not only do I have a limited review here in the States, I seem to have suckered in a few visitors from overseas:

• Hanoi, Dac Lac - Vietnam: 1 page view, 0 seconds
• Maleka, Malaysia: 1 page view, 0 seconds
• Canberra, Australian Capital Territory - Australia: 1 page view, 0 seconds, search term: Matt Damon
• Midgeton, Queensland - Australia: 1 page view, 0 seconds, search term: Matt Damon
• Strethall, Cambridgeshire - United Kingdom: 1 page view, 0 seconds
• Serbia and Montenegro - Belgrade: 1 page view, 0 seconds
• Rsunda, Stockholms Lan - Sweden: 1 page view, 0 seconds
• Dushanbe, Khatlon - Tajikistan: 1 page view, 2 minutes 22 seconds

(For my Imps-In-Law from the Republic of the Philippines, I know you are frequent visitors. Thank you!)

So what can we learn from these visits?

1. My caramel imps do not interest the majority of our worldwide visitors
2. Matt Damon is popular world-wide. I might just stick his name in my daily posts to 'keep 'em coming back for more!'
3. The people of Tajakistan are a bright, discerning people with wonderful taste :)

Now to the search terms:

• Imps (search origin: USA) - We have 'em! We love 'em. We even manage to sometimes tell you about them! :)
• Meme 'My Fine Is' (search origin: Buffalo Grove, Illinois) - Please stop back and let us know how 'bad' you are!!
• Kitchen Imps (search origin: Mount Vernon, New York) - boy.imp and girl.imp both like to 'help' us cook. We have caught boy.imp on more than one occassion washing dishes in the kitchen sink. Dishes are optional.

Search Origins whose name alone makes me want to visit:

• Collegedale, TN - what college is located here? (if any)
• North Andover, MA - is there a South Adover?
• Mount Holly Springs, PA - with a name like this, the waters must have curative powers
• Abbeville, South Carolina - must see historical sites (am assuming there are historical sites)
• Newtown Square, Pennsylvania - Of course I must see this town's square - new or old!
• Kingfisher, Oklahoma - Must.See.Kingfishers

Proving my Unyielding Anonymity

Google Searches

Raleigh, North Carolina: Pinched my sister’s butt.
Hoookay: I see you are well on your way to proving the clichés to be true

Newport News, Virginia: Sexy Imps
Well since being married and modestly humble means I cannot ‘pimp’ myself or my wife, then you will have to be satisfied with my picks;
1) Audrey Hepburn – even dead she is still the best
2) Keegan Connor Tracy (you can see her on the Sci Fi Channel in the show “Jake 2.0”)
3) Billie Piper (recently of Dr. Who fame)

Glasgow City, Glasgow, United Kingdom: Going for the Snip
Good luck dude!!

Blacksburg, Virginia: “Trophy Husband”
…ummm I am off of the market. But a picture (along with a quick review of your financial status) would never hurt…

Jacksonville, Florida: "Do You Know Your Spouse" "Game"
No, we were an arranged marriage and we still live in seperate countries. The game game is to guess how we both have three children since our marriage, even though we have never lived closer than 10,000 miles apart..?

Have you thought of visiting, one of THOSE stores that are advertised next to most truck stops along the freeway? (although the next game might be, how do I pay for certain meds without the wife finding out...?)

Los Angeles, California: Incessant Burping Cure
If you find out, then let me know. However, if you are younger than 25, I might suggest quitting the Frat..?

Louisville, Kentucky: Monkey Speak No Evil clipart
…is there a story behind this that is more interesting than this blog (how can there not be..?)

Kagoshima, Japan: Voltes V
Still a family favorite

Rochester, New York: No search term
Hello, Extreme Mortman. Y’all come back now, hear?

Whoduhthunkit.blogsome.com: Justdmarine
—I have neglected you (unintentionally) but this will soon be rectified.

Washington D.C. (dare I hope/dread coming to the attention of White House staff/management??), Karnataka, Bangalore, India and Seattle, Washington: Imps
(see Sexy Imps above)

Hope Valley, Rhode Island: Walmart Barefoot.
Yes, we have them out here too!

San Salvadore, El Salvadore: imp.play'gestures'
????

Proving that my ego has been flattened:

Stops: 1 page, 0 seconds – Oh, come on people!! Surely you can find something you liked..??

York Springs, Pennsylvania
Seattle, Washington
Waterford, Connecticut
Albany, Georgia
Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania
Wolcott, Indiana
Houston, Texas
Denver, Colorado
Nueva Ecija, Quezon, Philippines – You know, I am fairly certain I know who you are…
Valdosta, Georgia: 4 visits and you cannot even look around?? Come on! We won’t bite…much
Marshalltown, Iowa: 2 visits (see Valdosta, Georgia above)
Glace Bay, Nova Scotia, Canada