Dennis answered 'Have You...' questions in Get To Know Me.
Dated outside your race?: yes
Given a hickey?: yes
Dated your good friend/best friend?: yes
Sung in the shower?: sporadically
Spit in someone's drink?: yes
Dumped someone?: yes
Opened your Christmas presents early?: no
Peed outside?: yes
Seen "The Goonies" more than 10 times?: why?
Had more than five REAL bf/gf?: emotionally or physically?
Played a computer game for more than 5 hours?: yes
Ran through the sprinklers naked?: yes, they are called showers
Ate food that fell on the floor?: hello! boy!
Went outside naked?: same answer
Made out with your best friends bf/gf?: when I was single
Mooned somebody?: no
Been on stage?: yes
Made someone cry?: yes
Been in a parade?: yes
Been in a school play?: no
Drank beer?: yes
Gotten detention?: yes
Been on a plane?: yes
Been on a cruise?: no
Broken into a house?: mine
Gotten a tattoo?: no
Gotten piercings?: only accidentally
Cried so hard you threw up?: is this possible?
Gotten into a shouting match?: as an adult?
Been skinny dipping?: as an adult?
Spun yourself in circles to get dizzy on purpose?: yes
Laughed so hard it hurt?: yes
Tripped on your own feet?: yes
Cried yourself to sleep?: pre or post teen?
Cried in public?: yes
Thrown up in public?: yes-on a corvette at a corvette show - before the judging (boy was that guy happy)
Lied to your parents?: yes
Skipped class?: yes
Slept in class?: yes
What are you listening to right now: Torchwood
What makes you happy: Life
What did you do yesterday: lived
Got any awards: many
What car do you wish to have: 68-73 amx or amc javelin
Do you want to get married: not again (that would mean this one failed)
If you could change anything about yourself, what would you chan: more superpowers
Good driver: Richard Petty
Good dancer: Fred Estaire
Good Singer: Joan Jett
Have a lava lamp: no
How many remote controls are in your house: two (one boy and one girl)
Are you double jointed: no
What do you dream about: cannot remember my dreams
Last time you showered: today
The last movie you saw at the theatres: this month
Scary or happy movies: neither option is enticing (as hollywood has forgotten how to do either well)
Root beer or Dr. Pepper: both
Mud or Jell-O wrestling: neither
Vanilla or chocolate: in what context?
Skiing or Boarding: both
Summer or winter: both
Silver or Gold: lots of either
Diamond or pearl: same answer
Sunset or Sunrise: either
Sprite or 7up: neither
Orange juice or apple juice: either
Cats or dogs: either
Coffee or tea: either
Phone or in person: to do what?
Oldest, middle, youngest or only child: as long as she is over 18 (well that is just creepy, now it would have to be over 28)
Indoor or Outdoor: depends on what I am doing
Do you like filling these out: only when I'm bored
Do you wear contacts or glasses?: yes
Do you like yourself: yes
Do you get along with your family: yes
Have piercings below the waist: do nails through the leg count?
Stolen anything over $30: no
Obsessive: yes, but not when I am being compulsive
Compulsive: yes, but not when I am being obsessive
Anorexic: no
Bulimic: no
Suicidal: no
Eat a live hamster for $1,000,000: yuck
Go to a Manson concert if you had a free ticket: yuck
If you were stuck on an island, what people would you want with : anyone who could help get me off of said island
If you loved someone and you were keeping something from them an: a complete, coherent sentence maybe?
Do you admire anyone?: yes
Who is the last person that called you: called me what?
Who was the last person you slow danced with: wife.imp
What makes you laugh the most: life
What makes you smile: life
Chicken pox: scary
Sore Throat: could be scary
Broken nose: very scary
Tonsels removed: only once
Ice cream in the morning: not now
To give the heimlich: no
Your good luck charm: she knows who she is
Best song you ever heard: Pressure
Stupidest thing you have ever done: try to date a girl dating someone in a gang
What's your room like: which room?
Last thing you said: I waggled my e yebrows in the yes context, which is universally known and recognized by anyone who speaks Tagalog
What is beside you: coffee
What shampoo do you use: whatever is open
Something that has happened to you this year: I let someone walk all over me
Worst thing that has happened to you this year: the 2nd Annual Anal Probe
Given anyone a bath: in what context?
Smoked: never
Bungee Jumped: never
Made yourself throw-up: yes
Gone skinny dipping: never
Put your tongue on a frozen pole: yes
Broken a bone: yes
Played truth or dare: yes
Been in a physical fight: yes
Been in a police car: yes
Come close to dying: yes
Been in a sauna: yes
Been in a hot tub: yes
Ran away: yes
Broken someone's heart: yes
Cried when someone died: yes
Flashed someone: no
Cried in school: yes
Fell off your chair: yes
Sat by the phone all night waiting for a call: no
Saved MSN conversations: no
Saved e-mails: no
Made out with just a friend: yes
Used someone: yes, see above
Been cheated on?: yes
Done something you regret?: see 2 answers above
Favorite kind of pants: Clean
Favorite Number: one that wins the lottery
Boys Name: Tecumsah
Girls Name: Betty Boop
Animal: Lynx
Drink: Water
Sport: Baseball
Fast-Food Place: Let me know and I'll take the family...
Month: All
Band: the Who
Movie: The WInd
Breakfast: daily
Perfume: any not tested on animals
Cologne: any not tested on animals
Favourite cartoon character: no favorites
Who are your best friends: The voices, always the voices
Do you have a bf or gf?: :)
Best place to go for a date: anyplace where she is
Longest relationship: current
Shortest relationship: lasted one tank of gas
Outgoing or introverted?: depends on what is needed
Full Name: If you're reading this you know my name
Single or Taken: Taken
Sex: We do not speak of such things in public, or mixed company, or near the kids...oops, I guess that let the cat out of the bag!
Birthday: Once Per Year
Sign: One Way
Siblings: More than some less than most
Eye colour: Same
Shoe size: Same as in high school
Height: Medium
Country born: USA
Innie or Outie: When I was skinny an outie but as I have increased in mass an innie
What are you wearing right now: I am wearing everything right, right now
Where do you live: Here, unless I am there
Righty or lefty: I try to be independent
Any pets: Just the ants
Saturday, June 13, 2009
More Meme about Me!
Monday, February 16, 2009
Another List
1. WERE YOU NAMED AFTER ANYONE?
Nope
2. WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU CRIED?
It must have been the Fall of '87. We just lost the last football game of the year to make our total 1 and 11. No, I really was not enamored with my teammates so I guess the last time I really cried (not for my parents benefit when trying to avoid chores) was in 2nd grade when nobody would partner with me for an in-class project.
3. DO YOU LIKE YOUR HANDWRITING?
When I don't have to read it, yes.
4. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE LUNCH MEAT?
Hot
5. DO YOU HAVE KIDS?
Yes.
6. IF YOU WERE ANOTHER PERSON, WOULD YOU BE FRIENDS WITH YOU?
Who wouldn't? I mean I am nearly the center of the universe...and humble.
Did I mention the humbleness in my nature?
7. DO YOU USE SARCASM?
Me??
8. DO YOU STILL HAVE YOUR TONSILS?
No. But I still have all my fingers and toes and if you were around when I was growing up...
9. WOULD YOU BUNGEE JUMP?
Not sober...and I do not drink.
10. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE CEREAL?
Granola
11. DO YOU UNTIE YOUR SHOES WHEN YOU TAKE THEM OFF?
what, and give them a chance to escape?
12. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE ICE CREAM?
Sweet corn or Cheese
13. WHAT IS THE FIRST THING YOU NOTICE ABOUT PEOPLE
Pretty people?
14. RED OR PINK?
define the situation where this choice is important?
* Cooked Beef
* Bleeding from horrible wounds
If given these choices, then Pink.
15. WHAT IS YOUR LEAST FAVORITE THING ABOUT YOURSELF?
I cannot speak at least 7 different languages fluently
16. WHO DO YOU MISS THE MOST?
The candy man...no! The popsicle truck driving guy...no, that girl that introduced me to the Lewinski, before it was a Lewinski...
17. DO YOU WANT EVERYONE TO COMPLETE THIS LIST?
Sure why not...if you feel like it.
18. WHAT COLOR PANTS AND SHOES ARE YOU WEARING?
Pants? Pants? I don't need no stinkin' pants!
19. WHAT ARE YOU LISTENING TO RIGHT NOW?
Cincy Reds replay of a game from 1999
20. IF YOU WERE A CRAYON, WHAT COLOR WOULD YOU BE?
The White one...Nobody ever uses the white one so it is the only crayon in the box to not be used when all the others are broken and peeled...
21. FAVORITE SMELLS?
Let's shorten this list and say it is not, bad breath, stinky feet, dirty diapers or body odor
22. WHO WAS THE LAST PERSON YOU TALKED TO ON THE PHONE?
A telemarketer called...and probably won't be calling back.
23. WHAT ARE YOU PLANNING TO DO TOMORROW?
First I thought I would get out of bed and brush my teeth, then urinate
Or let's say urinate then brush my teeth
I might then eat breakfast, depending on how many NPR dreams I enjoyed
after that I will probably try to read part of the paper.
I tend to want to look at the weather first because if it is going to be warm, then I can take a light jacket with me when I go out, however if it is going to stay cold, then I will want only my coat...
24. FAVORITE SPORTS TO WATCH
Big Ten Network Executives: This answer is just for you.
NOT WRESTLING!!
25. HAIR COLOR?
I still have the natural color I was born with.
26. EYE COLOR?
Sounds permanent...
27. DO YOU WEAR CONTACTS?
I can poke my finger in my eye and barely manage to squeeze out a tear now
28. FAVORITE FOOD?
Today?
This week?
Last Month?
Why do you keep trying to pigeon hole me?? Why? Why I say??
29. SCARY MOVIES OR HAPPY ENDINGS?
ooooh...I loves me my happy endings...
does that sound a little creepy to you too?
30. LAST MOVIE YOU WATCHED?
Happy Times!
Funny Chinese movie
31. SUMMER OR WINTER?
When it's summer, then summer
When it's winter, then winter
32. HUGS OR KISSES?
BOTH
33. MOST LIKELY TO RESPOND?
Is anybody out there?
34. LEAST LIKELY TO RESPOND?
See above.
35. WHAT BOOK ARE YOU READING NOW?
I am reading 4 (or if I can find that Pratchett book then 5) books right now
36. WHAT IS ON YOUR MOUSE PAD?
the mouse
37. WHAT DID YOU WATCH ON TV LAST NIGHT?
WIpeout, something on DIsney, Something on Nick, Something on Disney again...That Chinese movie...
38. ROLLING STONES OR BEATLES?
Stones
39. WHAT IS THE FARTHEST YOU HAVE BEEN FROM HOME?
Conscious?
40. WHERE WERE YOU BORN?
Third Rock from the Sun
Wednesday, February 11, 2009
Meme Madness
Rules: Use the first letter of your name to answer each of the following questions. They have to be real. . . nothing made up! You cannot use any word twice and you can't use your name for the boy/girl name question.
Have Fun!!
1. What is your name: Dennis
2. A four Letter Word: Deep
3. A boy's Name: David
4. A girl's Name: Dolly
5. An occupation: Diplomat
6. A color: Damask
7. Something you wear: Denim
8. A food: Dates
9. Something found in the bathroom: Diaper Rash ointment (yes, our imps have been out of diapers for a few years now…we probably need to clean out our medicine cabinet)
10. A place: Denver
11. A reason for being late: ‘damn alarm clock is set on the NPR station and instead of waking up I incorporated the news into my dreams…’
12. Something you shout: Dang me! Dang me! They oughta take a rope and hang me! High from the highest tree….! (ok, just ‘dang it!’)
13. A movie title: Deer Hunter
14. Something you drink: Diet Cola
15. A musical group: Def Leppard
16. An animal: Dolphin
17. A street name: Dearborne Ave.
18. A type of car: Duesenberg
19. A song title: Dock of the Bay
20. A verb: Deliver
Thursday, February 05, 2009
I Have Been Tagged
Thank you Diana!
1. My favorite bumper stickers: As a matter of fact office, I do own the road! //
Kissing a smoker is like licking an ashtray
2. My baby photo makes the dog walking backwards with its butt shaved a Brad
Pitt look-a-like
3. I am often at odd with myself: Store this junk just in case it can be useful or
throw this crap away because it take up too much space
4. As a younger lad, deadlines tended to amuse me
5. They still do.
6. Our family had its own time zone. There was the Eastern Time zone, Slow
time (re: how women view the actual time when they are supposed to leave the
house for a party) and our family's time (re: how long the scout troop/baseball
team/football team would actually delay departing on a road trip before I would
finally show up)
7. I will judge your character within 1 minute of actually meeting you. (I have a
brother who will make his decision based on the first words out of your mouth)
8. I have never been wrong
9. I tend to finish your part of the conversation in my mind before you actually
do finish speaking
10. This makes laughing at your jokes hard
11. I have been wrong
12. I do realize that I am not the center of the universe
13. No, really. I am serious.
14. I believe that all things are possible to achieve
15. Until you don't achieve them. Then they are impossible, impractical, and just plain not cool
16. I have often tried to discern the moment when political correctness took the place of common sense
17. I believe that with today's pc culture the phrase 'Suck it up' can cause more trouble than it helps
18. Suck it up!
19. Tattoos as a means to show how tough one is is so low class. Any damn fool can draw a picture
20. But the covering of ones body with the scars of life (like that tree branch that broke my fall--momentarily- when I was 5sh, or that scar on my arm from when I was wrestling my brother and he pulled my arm through the metal workings on the underside of the couch or the time I dropped that knife through the back of my hand)...
21. Everyone please meet any damn fool...
22. Redheads are the best (especially when it comes with green eyes and a slight Irish lilt)
23. Bottled red is worse than bottled blonde
24. Pundits (both liberal and conservative--moderates have too much self-respect) should be caged on and island somewhere. Guantanamo..?
25. I often wonder if Hollywood can/will actually release more than 2-3 films a year that are not remakes of an older movie
Saturday, April 21, 2007
5 More Questions!
Delusional. I am a thin guy in a fat man's suit and I keep thinking I look svelte but occassionally will find myself eating that bowl of chocolate covered ice cream after 11 p.m. That and I am a slave to the golden arches but claim that I eat healthy.
Can you recognize your faults and still be called delusional?
2) If you won the lottery, what would be the very first thing you would do (after passing out cold and having to be revived...)?
1) Pay off the bad debt
2) Invest in our retirements
3) Set up a family fund for college tuitions (to be accessed only after it sits collecting interest for at least 5 years - nothing less than a 'B' average will be acceptable to keep on this dole. 'Cause if you're getting a free ride on my $$ you better be studying!!)
3) What one physical possession do you own that you think most defines your personality?
My new Palladium Shoes!! KIDDING!! (They are Suh-weet tho!)
Acutally it is my laptop! Yes, the portable computer. Its a dependable, hard-worker, sporty, versitile and the potential is untapped!
4) How do you think the internet has changed society the most?
I think it has made it easier for people to communicate without really getting to know each other. It builds a world-wide neighborhood, except the neighbors are not asked to go outside and interact face to face. So we are creating a lot of intimate strangers.
5) If you were to be reincarnated, and you could NOT come back as a human being, what would you come back as and why?
Silk threads! I can see by the expressions on your faces that you doubt me. Ok, follow the logic:
First the worm will squeeze the threads out its a** (ok, not a pretty beginning but...). Then the thread is collected and processed and reformed into 'sexy' (see, I am moving up in the world) lingerie. Said clothing article is purchased and worn by hot babes and I spend the rest of my life caressing said hot babes...
Or life as Cougar sounds interesting. Mountain views, free to roam, no cell phones/pagers/text messaging, no shoes where the shoelaces constantly come untied and drag through cold, wet, bacteria-enriched puddles...
You can keep this going by posting the rules under your answers!!
Leave me a comment saying, "Interview me."
I will respond by asking you five questions. I get to pick the questions.
You will update your weblog with the answers to the questions.
You will include this explanation and an offer to interview someone else in the same post.
When others comment asking to be interviewed, you will ask them five questions.
Wednesday, April 18, 2007
Ye ole interview questions
Mama of 2 posted some interview questions on her site and it appears that this trend is sweeping the blogosphere. So I upped and volunteered and Mo2 supplied the following questions :)
1. In a prodominately mommyblog filled world what drove you to start blogging?
For a while there I was a full-time SAHD. But I felt that with a (then) toddler and pre-schooler that my creative outlet was stifled. I simply did not have the energy to pursue my writing and Wife.Imp got tired of hearing me complain. She also is an avid NPR listener and heard about the rise in blogging, specifically daddy bloggers and she finally told me to shut up and type--just don't embarrass her.
2. What's the most important thing you have learned from your children so far?
The most important thing I have learned from my children is to loosen up and let the inner child loose.
3. If you and your wife could switch places for a day, would you and why?
Hell No! Nothing against wife.imp, she is a fabulous person and I am lucky to have met her. However, I really like me too. Yep, I am happy with who I am and I have to admit that since puberty women start leaking from various parts of their bodies for a wide assortment of reasons and I am not the least bit tempted to experience that kind of fun, not even for just one day!
4. What qualities do you think make you a good dad?
I give the imps lots and lots of ice cream! Actually I like to challenge the imps to be creative and not be afraid to try new things. If you let fear of failure stop you, you stop growing as a person and you fall short of your potential.
5. If you won the lottery do you think it would change your moral center?
Well, it will definately change our location! But we are on fairly firm footing with the moral center issue.
So to anyone that is interested, I'll interview YOU!
Here's what you do:
1. *Leave me a comment saying, "Interview me." *
2. *I will respond by asking you five questions. I get to pick thequestions. *
3. *You will update your weblog with the answers to the questions. *
4. *You will include this explanation and an offer to interviewsomeone else in the same post. *
5. *When others comment asking to be interviewed, you will ask themfive questions.*
Be sure to add this at the end of your questions so that people that read your blog can ask you to interview them.
Monday, April 09, 2007
New Music for an old Meme
Ok, my 7 song meme has been posted but I have been thinking and today I am changing my pics:
Today:
Beethoven gets the axe (tomorrow he might be back) in favor of Ravel's "Bolero"
The Who (I get a bad taste in my mouth even typing this--so for today only) is replaced by
Guns'N'Roses "Welcome to the Jungle"Queen Cherry Poppin' Daddies Tchaikovsky(I think I might have imbibed waaaaay too much of something to even consider this) is being nixed for Metallica's "Enter the Sandman"
Ok, since I have booted the rest, Scott Joplin is going awol in favor of Neil Diamond's "Brother Loves Travelling Salvation Show"
and what the hell,
Goodbye Queen and replace it with Dwight Yoakam's "Fast As you"
and the Cherry Poppin' Daddies must leave us to be replaced by the Best song of this Century: Matchbox 20's "Bent"
Bonus track would be Aram Khachaturian's "Saber Dance"
Tuesday, April 03, 2007
Three Things Meme - because I have absolutely nothing to talk about
Oh, my niece (wife.imp's brother's daughter) is visiting from the Philippines. Other than that -- I have nothing. Nothing new...soooo
here is the Meme which I first saw at Undercover Angel's blog (see link in right hand column):
Three Things That Scare Me:
(the books I can fill up with this...)
1. Disease (I have a lifelong balancing act with Hemochromatosis as it is - I really would like to not add to this list)
2. Heights (My siblings thinks this stems from the fact that I fell out of a few trees when I was younger)
3. Retirement (with the way the gov't is spending - I might not live to confront this fear)
Three People Who Make Me Laugh:
1. wife.imp
2. girl.imp
3. boy.imp
Three Things I Love:
(can we repeat answers? No?...)
1. Spring
2. Fall
3. Winter - but only when it snows
Three Things I Hate:
1. Winter - immediately after the snow stops and that time when it rains/sleets but does not snow
2. Most morning shows on the radio - talktalktalkblahblahblah----NOT FUNNY!
3. Mosquitos
Three Things I Don’t Understand:
1. Going to the beach
2. Why doesn't wife.imp ever smell a dirty diaper even though the odor eminating from boy.imp's rear could knock a buzzard off of a sh@@@ wagon at 30 paces???
3. Why so many people give a damn about 'Street Cred'???
Three Things On My Desk:
1. Broken Printer
2. Empty Ink Cartridge box for said broken printer
3. Digital Camera
Three Things I’m Doing Right Now:
1. Avoiding starting dinner
2. Wondering where today's paper got to so that I can start the crossword
3. Revising the last scene in my book...I need to get to it again tonight
Three Things I Want To Do Before I Die:
1. Eco-Tourist
2. Triplets - ahem - Run a Marathon
3. Purchase the Cleveland Browns
Three Things I Can Do:
1. Clean the wax out of my ears
2. Mow the lawn
3. Remodel the bathroom and kitchen in my house (wife.imp has the lists started)
Three Things I Can’t Do:
1. Squeeze Blood from a Stone
2. Feign interest in watching another episode of 'Law and Order'
3. Sing
Three Things I Think You Should Listen To:
1. Well written poetry
2. John Huston narrating anything
3. The Doctor
Three Things You Should Never Listen To:
1. Peer Pressure
2. Pop Culture
3. Connie Chung (HUGELY disappointed with her professional ethics)
Three Things I’d Like To Learn:
1. German
2. Tagalog
3. Sketch Art - using ink as the medium
Three Favorite Foods:
1. Tsynigang
2. My sausage stuffing
3. Ham Loaf
Three Shows I Watched As A Kid:
1. The A-Team
2. Shazam!
3. The Electric Company
Three Things I Regret:
1. Not going out of my way to at least say hello to a brother and sister in our school. She dropped out in 8th grade (it might have been earlier) because she was pregnant. Her brother hung himself from the rafters of a barn a year earlier
2. Not learning to ignore peer pressure earlier in life
3. Not following through with Fencing in college. I was invited to join the team but at the same time I really got into my major and thought I would not be able to handle the time conflicts
Three Reasons Why I'm Not Going To Tag Anyone:
1. Three people read my post and one of them already did this meme
2. If they did not do it, would it reflect on how they view me or would I find out that they did not read my post..? My ego might not withstand that kind of rejection :)
3. When was the last time I ever said 'tag you're it'?
Thursday, March 29, 2007
My 7 Songs - Meme
So I thought I'd jump on board for this meme as the weekend is coming up and I need to quit showing my darker side to the world at large...
In no particular order:
Beethoven
5th symphony - Lot of choices with Beethoven but this is one that really never gets old.
Tchaikovsky
Piano Concerto #1 - I like to think tchaikovsky had a unique sound amongst his peers and that if he lived in today's society, he would be trashing hotel rooms and getting drunk on stage. However he did know his music and this is one of the best.
Scott Joplin
The Entertainer - This is the first among Joplin's songs that I ever heard and remains a constant favorite.
Cherry Poppin’ Daddies
Pink Elephant - who can't love a song about getting trashed and hallucinating?? (an alternate to this would be CPD's 'Here Comes the Snake')
Queen
Pressure - I play this so much in the car that wife.imp is starting to apply some 'pressure' on me...(an alternate would be about any Queen song ever recorded but 'Who Wants to Live Forever' is right up there)
The Who
Baba O’Riley - only because I had to pick just one. Really just pick an album select a track and play...
Bono
Two Shots of Happy, One Shot of Sad - Sung at Sinatra's 80th. Love this Song!!
Monday, February 26, 2007
"Six Strange Things about Me" Meme
Every so often I realize that I missed out on something around the Playground. So I have to fall back on other things and the latest meme to go around the bloggernet is this one.
Just in time to bore you:
1: I cannot stand being around sick people (strangers, relatives, friends, cats, dogs, birds, fish...myself). I've been this way since visiting my grandmother in the hospital (I was 14 or 15) just before she passed. Come to think of it, I do not really enjoy being inside of hospitals either.
2: I love books! I love to read. I have always loved to read. I finished Alex Haley's 'Roots' when I was 9 years-old and the LOTR trilogy by the time I was 11. By the time I was 14, I had finished every Ray Bradbury, Zane Grey and Alexander Dumas book I could find.
I do not have a lot of faith in my math, science and foriegn language skills. But I do like me my books.
3: I have been hit, as a pedestrian, by 2 cars, ran a car into a culvert ditch and flipped a car at 65-miles-per-hour, but the worst 2 accidents I have had outside of a car were:
- when I was 6sh, I ran my bicycle full-speed into a curb, trying to pop-a-wheelie, and ended up somersaulting over the handle bars and landing on my face. My mouth was numb for approximately 30 minutes and I really, really chipped my upper, front, two teeth.
- when I was in college I tried to beat 4 lanes of traffic while doing my daily jog. I would have been ok, but a couple (newly dating because they were oblivious to everything as they snogged on the street corner) were standing in the middle of the handicap ramp. I tried to jump around them and landed awkwardly on the side slope of the ramp. Turns out I blew out all the tendons on the outside of my foot. The doctor told me I would have been better served if I had broken my ankle.
- I was in plastic casts for 6-months.
- I was poor and I was a waiter.
- I had just started dating wife.imp.
- I rode a motorcycle with a foot shifter. Care to guess which foot was injured?
- I ended up walking from my apartment to classes (approx. 2 miles one way) on crutches.
- I was injured in the Fall.
5: For the first 5 years of our marriage, wife.imp got the dresser to put her clothes in and I got to use a suitcase and a two-drawer cardboard dresser. Thing is, I was never pressed for room in the 'dresser.'
Oh, I am a clothes whore now, but back then two pair jeans, two t-shirts...you see the pattern don't you?
6: I have been banned by wife.imp from ever entering a used book store or used record (LP) store. I have over 500 books (I have read most of them) and over 850 LPs. I would love to fill room after room with them but wife.imp selfishly insists that we actually do need things like beds, dressers, tables, sofas etc...
Matt Damon Factor is hereby applied
Friday, January 26, 2007
'My Fine Is...' UPDATED and less Tame!!
Here’s how it works: You don’t have to confess your answers, just the amount of your fine. (Not per incident!) Tally up your score and post it on your blog with the title… ”My Fine Is…”
OK, this MEME was fine, as far as it went. But to make this more interesting and to really make you honest the list has been broken into 4 major categories (the psychoanalyst amonst you should really enjoy this).
Take your fine and break it down into the total sums for each category (Answers were originally posited to include childhood to present. However I think anything Pre-Teen should be given a pass). How well did you truly know yourselves? If you dare, repost your totals reflecting the total sums as they relate to the categories below!
How well do you know your spouse/significant other? Have them complete this and compare the fine you anticipated with their actual total! (remember the fines are not limited to the time your significant other has spent with you…)
Drugs/Alcohol
Smoked pot — $10
Did acid — $5
Woke up in the morning and did not know the person who was next to you — $40
Ever got drunk at work, or went to work while still drunk — $50
Got drunk, passed out and don’t remember the night before — $20
Deviant Sex
(we assume everything not directly related to procreating and not the Missionary Position a fine…)
Ever had sex at church — $25
Had sex with someone on MySpace — $25
Had sex for money — $100
Had sex on your parents’ bed — $10
Used toys while having sex — $30
Had sex in a pool — $20
Had sex with someone of the same sex — $20
Cheated on your significant other — $10
Masturbated — $10
Cheated on your significant other with their relative or close friend — $20
Done oral — $5
Got oral — $5
Done/got oral in a car while it was moving — $25
Had sex with someone in jail — $25
Made a nasty home video — $15
Had a threesome — $50
Had sex in the wild — $20
Had sex with someone 10 years older — $20
Had sex with someone under 21 and you are over 27 — $25
Had sex with your best friend — $20
Had sex with someone you work with at work — $25
Had anal sex — $80
Deviant Behavior
(again some of these might be more fun than ‘bad’ but they are outside what society calls the ‘accepted norm’)
Kissed some one who’s name you didn’t know — $0.10
Given money to stripper — $25
Been in love with a stripper — $20 (should actually be more because, how can you be in love with a stripper unless you were visiting her place of work????)
Crossed dressed — $10
Hit on someone of the same sex while at work — $15
Went skinny dipping — $5
Kissed someone of the same sex — $10 (giving anyone a peck on the cheek does NOT count)
Been in the same room while someone was having sex — $25
Been in love with two people or more at the same time — $50 (now this fine is just cruel)
Said you love someone but didn’t mean it — $25 (really depends on why you said it, but for the guys we’ll just assume the worst)
Went streaking — $5
Went streaking in broad daylight — $15
Peed in the pool — $0.50
Played spin the bottle — $5
Done something you regret — $20
Lied to your mate — $5
Lied to your mate about the sex being good — $25
Criminal Behavior
Vandalized something — $20
Beat up someone — $20
Been jumped — $10 – (why is being a victim punished with a fine? I don’t know…)
Ever drive drunk — $20
Stole something — $10 (as long as it has value and you took it, it counts!)
Stole something worth more than a hundred dollars — $20
Been arrested — $5
Spent time in jail — $15
My original fine: $410.60
My totals (excluding pre-teen activities): $390.10
Drugs/Alcohol: $0.00
Deviant Sex: $165
Deviant Behavior: $175.10
Criminal Behavior: $50.00
MamaG, Diane - consider yourselves tagged :)
Thursday, January 25, 2007
Time to Take A Meme-- Come on. You Know You Want To...
GO WITH YOUR FIRST INSTINCTS ! If you are interested the key and my answers are in the Comments. If you do take this Meme on your own....please let me know.
WHEN CHOOSING NAMES, MAKE SURE THEY ARE REAL PEOPLE THAT YOU ACTUALLY KNOW
1. ON A BLANK SHEET OF PAPER, WRITE NUMBERS 1 THROUGH 10 IN A COLUMN ON THE LEFT.
2. BESIDE THE NUMBERS 1 WRITE DOWN ANY NUMBER YOU WANT.
DO YOU HAVE A FAVORITE NUMBER?
3. BESIDE THE NUMBERS 2 & 6, WRITE DOWN THE NAMES OF TWO MEMBERS OF THE OPPOSITE SEX.
4. WRITE ANYONE’ NAME NEXT TO 3, 4, & 5.
(LIKE FRIENDS OR FAMILY...)
5. WRITE DOWN FOUR SONG TITLES IN 7, 8, 9, & 10
Friday, July 21, 2006
LIFE EXPERIENCES MEME
01. Bought everyone in the bar a drink –do not drink.
02. Swam with wild dolphins – no, but once at Cedar Point I got to be part of the Dolphin stage show
03. Climbed a mountain – Boy Scouts. Philmont Scout Camp, NM. 2 weeks of fun!
04. Taken a Ferrari for a test drive – why a Ferrari? Corvette, yes. Porche – yes.
05. Been inside the Great Pyramid
06. Held a tarantula - I beat the hell out of a Black Widow once…
07. Taken a candlelit bath with someone
08. Said 'I love you' and meant it - frequently
09. Hugged a tree – also kicked a tree, climbed a tree, fell out of a tree, got blind-sided by a tree
10. Bungee jumped – only if I would be drunk. See #1
11. Visited Paris
12. Watched a lightning storm at sea – would huddling in a leaky tent while two thunderstorms collide above the campgrounds count?
13. Stayed up all night long and saw the sun rise
14. Seen the Northern Lights
15. Gone to a huge sports game – every game at the ‘Shoe is a huge game. BIG 10 rules!!
16. Walked the stairs to the top of the leaning Tower of Pisa
17. Grown and eaten your own vegetables – and had the pleasure of weeding the garden they were in too
18. Touched an iceberg
19. Slept under the stars – on the side of a hill after sliding out of the tent during a rain shower
20. Changed a baby's diaper- what Einstein thought this one up?
21. Taken a trip in a hot air balloon – got gypped out of one during my vacuum cleaner salesman days
22. Watched a meteor shower
23. Gotten drunk on champagne – See #1. At most ½ glass on New Year’s Eve
24. Given more than you can afford to charity
25. Looked up at the night sky through a telescope
26. Had an uncontrollable giggling fit at the worst possible moment – I was being fired from a ranch in Colorado. I went back 2 years later to a different ranch and completed the summer.
27. Had a food fight – I was the 2nd of two boys. The food was raw and plucked from plants in our garden…
28. Bet on a winning horse – I was actually 13 and not allowed to be but picked 3 trifectas in a Row. My uncle and grandfather only bet on the last. They split $700 each. I got my hair tousled and a firm ‘atta-boy’
29. Asked out a stranger – I am male and once single (then I was married and this became moot)
30. Had a snowball fight – both with and without pebbles in the snowballs and sometimes without the iceballs
31. Screamed as loudly as you possibly can - high school football. No really since
32. Held a lamb – and ate lamb
33. Seen a total eclipse - in middle school
34. Ridden a roller coaster- never since high school and only then because I was still more asleep than awake when I was strapped in...
35. Hit a home run
36. Danced like a fool and not cared who was looking - only for the imps.
37. Adopted an accent for an entire day – I actually spend each and every day trying to hide my Ohio hillbilly accent
38. Actually felt happy about your life, even for just a moment - every day
39. Had two hard drives for your computer
40. Visited all 50 states – at last count I was in the low 30s
41. Taken care of someone who was shit faced – actually got someone shit faced and then left the party to try and get more victims friends to come over
42. Had amazing friends – is this ‘had’ as in the biblical sense?
43. Danced with a stranger in a foreign country – does Tennessee count?
44. Watched wild whales
45. Stolen a sign – from a trash heap
46. Backpacked in Europe
47. Taken a road-trip
48. Gone rock climbing – Philmont Scout Camp
49. Midnight walk on the beach
50. Gone sky diving – see #10 above
51. Visited Ireland – why Ireland? Why not other Islands like Greenland, Iceland or Bimini? I have not been to any of the above either.
52. Been heartbroken longer than you were actually in love – male and puberty
53. In a restaurant, sat at a stranger's table and had a meal with them
54. Visited Japan
55. Milked a cow – most milking, even among the Amish are done via machines. Fed milk to a calf tho’.
56. Alphabetized your cds – and then used them. They need re-alphabetized now..
57. Pretended to be a superhero - I have kids. And also enjoy the odd RPG
58. Sung karaoke – I was booed offstage at my sister’s wedding by my neice
59. Lounged around in bed all day – ahhh, the benefits of a college education
60. Posed nude in front of strangers
61. Gone scuba diving
62. Kissed in the rain
63. Played in the mud
64. Played in the rain
65. Gone to a drive-in theater
66. Visited the Great Wall of China
67. Started a business
68. Fallen in love and not had your heart broken - married once and am still married
69. Toured ancient sites – the walled city in the Philippines
70. Taken a martial arts class
71. Played D&D for more than 6 hours straight
72. Gotten married
73. Been in a movie – home movies—No, not the Paris Hilton kind of home movies!!
74. Crashed a party
75. Gotten divorced
76. Gone without food for 5 days
77. Made cookies from scratch – before I found out about the hazards of raw eggs this used to be fun…
78. Won first prize in a costume contest
79. Ridden a gondola in Venice
80. Gotten a tattoo – might as well ask if I have done other permanent damage like body piercings
81. Rafted the Snake River
82. Been on television news programs as an "expert"
83. Got flowers for no reason
84. Performed on stage – see #58 above
85. Been to Las Vegas
86. Recorded music – sent wife imp a tape with my singing…I must be in love
87. Eaten shark - always a better idea than doing the reverse.
88. Had a one-night stand – Hello!! Male college environment!!!
89. Gone to Thailand
90. Bought a house
91. Been in a combat zone
92. Buried one/both of your parents
93. Been on a cruise ship
94. Spoken more than one language fluently – how many words count as fluent?
95. Performed in Rocky Horror.
96. Raised children - currently progressing to 'raised'
97. Followed your favorite band/singer on tour
98. Created and named your own constellation of stars
99. Taken an exotic bicycle tour in a foreign country
100. Picked up and moved to another city to just start over – the business failed leaving us with a mortgage, rent on two apts., one storage unit and two car payments
101. Walked the Golden Gate Bridge – I have been driven across a few times..
102. Sang loudly in the car, and didn't stop when you knew someone was looking - who doesn’t?
103. Had plastic surgery
104. Survived an accident that you shouldn't have survived. – birth count?
105. Wrote articles for a large publication – former newspaper reporter with lots of front page exposure
106. Lost over 100 pounds – am working on losing 30 right now
107. Held someone while they were having a flashback – had a girlfriend in college and was rounding third and heading for home when she flashed back to a time when she had been raped in high school. No, this was not forced. She had been harboring major feelings of guilt this was the moment she unloaded them. We stayed together for almost 2 years...
108. Piloted an airplane – does Flight Simulator on the PC count?
109. Petted a stingray
110. Broken someone's heart – male, college—remember?
111. Helped an animal give birth
112. Won money on a T.V. game show
113. Broken a bone – every toe on both feet
114. Gone on an African photo safari
115. Had a body part of yours below the neck pierced – jeez, why not stain your skin with tattoos, shave your head and join a cult!!
116. Fired a rifle, shotgun, or pistol – I was once ranked ‘Pro-Marksman’ with a .22 caliber rifle
117. Eaten mushrooms that were gathered in the wild – yes but not gathered by me
118. Ridden a horse- I rode herd on a stampede of horses
119. Had major surgery – Yes, Tonsils
120. Had a snake as a pet – we captured a Garter Snake and turned it loose in our yard…
121. Hiked to the bottom of the Grand Canyon
122. Slept for more than 30 hours over the course of 48 hours – good old college days and back spasms with prescribed drugs (I did mention the drugs were legal??)
123. Visited more foreign countries than U.S. states
124. Visited all 7 continents
125. Taken a canoe trip that lasted more than 2 days
126. Eaten kangaroo meat – Deer, rabbit, squirrel, ostrich, buffalo, snake, goat (at least they told me it was goat)
127. Eaten sushi – actually I am strongly encouraged by my doctor to not eat sushi and not for the reasons most people would assume…
128. Had your picture in the newspaper – high school football. As a reporter I twice was asked to take a photo to accompany my story and had my car in the background..
129. Changed someone's mind about something you care deeply about
130. Gone back to school – two college degrees
131. Para-sailed – see #1
132. Petted a cockroach – I then tossed them into the bathtub and fried them with aerosol flamethrowers (more college memories)
133. Eaten fried green tomatoes
134. Read The Iliad and the Odyssey – and all the Shakespeare plays, Sir Gawain and the Green Knight and Beowulf and Dante’s Inferno and Paradise Lost/Regained
135. Selected one "important" author who you missed in school and read
136. Killed and prepared an animal for eating
137. Skipped all your school reunions
138. Communicated with someone without sharing a common spoken language – this often led to one night stands (pre-marriage)
139. Been elected to public office
140. Written your own computer language – this is only for the uber-geeks! (I am merely a has-been geek)
141. Thought to yourself that you're living your dream. – however there is still room for improvement
142. Had to put someone you love into hospice care
143. Built your own PC from parts - with help
144. Sold your own artwork to someone who didn't know you
145. Had a booth at a street fair
146: Dyed your hair - see the entries for body piercing and tattoos
147: Been a DJ
148: Shaved your head – had a headache after work one day and told the woman to use #2 clippers front to back and top to bottom. One would have thought I pulled out a gun and asked for all her valuables…
149: Caused a car accident – fell asleep at the wheel with cruise control locked at 65 mph. Pavement looks less appealing when it is sliding past over one’s head at high speed...
150: Saved someone's life
If anyone would like to see me expound on any of these items, shoot me an email and I'll try to answer them in a future entry.
Tuesday, July 18, 2006
My Collection of Silly Lists
Seeing as how everyone has done lists:
-Mama Drama has a nice list
-Cynical Dad has started a listing of his top 100 albums (however he has admitted the Who is not at or near the top. Even so with this dimished list--it is something to keep one's eye on.)
-Mrs. Fortune from July 10, Stuck In Elmo's world must have had the world's worst day ever!!
My list. I am white -- neon white, and, even though I grew up in the hills of Ohio, I am so backward I cannot even qualify as a redneck. I am married to a Filipina! She's educated. She has traveled the world, worked on 4 continents. She is funny.
She sent me the following list:
You May be Married to a Filipina If:
1- Your refrigerator is always full but you cannot find any food that you recognize
(I do the shopping most of the time, so this usually is not applicable)
2- Instead of a dowry, you got the whole bill for the wedding and honeymoon
(in the US the bride's folks traditionally foot the bill, oddly in the Philippines it is the groom's parents. We went into debt on day one)
3- Most of the decorations in your house are made of wicker
(not remotely true, yet...)
4- You are expected to be able to read her mind just by watching her eyebrows move up and down and which way her lips are pointed
(boy oh boy after 12 years I still have not mastered this skill!! I really really wish I could do this)
5- All her relatives think your name is Joe
(nope. just a dumb cliche)
6- The instant you are married you have 3000 new close relatives that you can't tell apart
(ummm...I have a pre-marriage story about this...)
7- Your house isn't really on fire, but there is a very charred fish right on top of the stove burner
(we had this once...)
8- All the desserts are sticky and all the snacks are salty...
(tooooo true!!)
9- She eats her fruit with giant salt crystals and her fried chicken with ketchup
(YES!)
10- Even the ketchup tastes weird... very weird
(2 words - banana ketchup)
11- You throw a party and everyone is fighting to chop the leathery skin off a dead pig
(not at any of our parties!!)
12- All your kids have 4-5 middle names
(well, b.imp does)
13- Your in-laws take 10 years to acknowledge your existence and to call you by something other than "that white guy"
(I don't think I could ever be known as anything than 'that white guy')
14- You try to call her up on the phone and someone tells you "for a while" and you want to know "for a while, what??"
(THIS HAPPENED!! ALOT!!!)
15- You are trying to go to sleep and she keeps asking for the comFORT'r, and you ain't got a clue what she's talking about
(can anyone say BLANKET??)
16- Your first Christmas present is some funny looking baggy see-thru shirt made out of leftover lace doilies
(actually I want one but w.imp keeps denying me that pleasure)
17- Your phone bills are all international and average 3 hours per call
(...and nobody thought to tell me about how international calling rates and regular phone rates are different...VASTLY different)
18- She sweeps with something that witches usually fly around on
(now we have 5-6 of them)
19- Her idea of classy, expensive champagne is Asti Spumante
(well, w.imp's idea of class is sooo far above Asti Spumante that it is pretty ridiculous)
20- The rice cooker is on 24 hours a day and uses up 50% of your electric and food budget
(well, we do eat and inordinate amount of rice. Even the imps prefer rice over potatoes...)
21- On your first trip to the Philippines, you have 18 giant boxes that weigh 1000 pounds each and your "carry on" luggage requires a small forklift truck. The same luggage is over filled with things that cost an average of 15 cents each like old magazines and M&Ms
(this would be my 2nd-5th trips. the first trip could have landed me in prison. Live and learn folks...)
22- the worst part is when you get off the plane, the same stuff you've been
hauling around half way around the world is available in every store in the airport for
half the price!
('nough said)
23- The first time she's pregnant you have to go out at 4:00 in the morning
looking for some weird type of greasy sausages
(Nope! Burger King!)
24- You buy a new $500 freezer so she can store 200 pounds of SPAM that was on sale
(if we had a freezer that large it would be full of spam and bungose)
25- She gets really excited by sucking the fat out of pig knees
(YuCK! She does dig the fat out of about everything else)
26- Your daughter gets her ears pierced when she's 2 minutes old but your
sons are not circumcised until they turn 13
(Yeah, this was discussed and b.imp was 'fixed' before we left the hospital. Some traditions can stay in the islands)
27- Her favorite sauce is called "patis," Americans call it turpentine
(Pah-Teece. Learn how to say it so you do not have to taste it!)
28- She actually thinks that bowling and golf and billiards are real sports
and are more important than baseball and football
(due to our early indoctrination procedures, this has been corrected)
29- You were married 5 years before she explained to you that "ARAY!" doesn't
mean "ooh, baby!"
(w.imp actually did not explain it until we saw this list. However I figured out the difference on the 1st night of our honeymoon...)
30- She prefers bistek to beef steak
(yes!)
31- you still don't know what's the difference between manong and manok
(I think one is a chicken...)
32- She goes to the movies just for the AC
(w.imp goes anywhere just for the AC)
33- Her homeland has more Megamalls than islands
(I believe! I believe!)
34- Before every holiday and visit, her sisters fax you a 10 page "bilins" list which says "suggestion only."
(and if you think they are only suggestions...)
35- Your kitchen table has a merry-go-round in the middle
(not yet but we still have hope)
36- Her friends are named Chinky, Girlie, Boy and Bimbo and you are not allowed to smirk
(I have bite mark scars on the insides of my lips...)
37 - All your place settings has the silverware backwards and there are no knives
(I usually do have the only knife at the table)
38- She washes her hair with a bucket and her car with a broom
(I take the 5th on this one...)
39- She "cleans" her closet by throwing all the crap into your closet
(wait a minute! I get a closet? Our first 3 years in our house I lived out of a suitcase and a cardboard bureau)
40- When she says nothing is wrong that is when there is trouble!!
(This is endemic of all women!)
AND LAST BUT NOT LEAST: You are pretty proud of yourself because you think you snagged up for yourself some unique, rare, tropical goddess type until you go to the Philippines and can't tell her apart from anyone else in the whole country
(unless she's taller than 5'1", then it's a bit easier)
Too lazy to blog
Today I am too lazy to blog--or too tired and I will be running out and about tonight. So, I have decided that I will not post much today.
Instead I am going be commenting extensively today on other blogs. Yeah me!
I however have decided to change it up a bit. I am going to theme post. No matter the topic that has been posting, my comments must be relevent and not trivial. The kicker is, I have to include what I believe is the worst song ever recorded: 'Microbes' by George Harrison off of his "Wonderwall Music" album.
I am going to also challenge the following to do the same with what they believe is the worst song ever written in their comments one day this week:
