Monday, September 18, 2006

Restaurants should supply tie-down straps with their seats

girl.imp's modis operendi at a restaurant is to: Sit, Kneel, Stand, Lean...repeat.

Then when she knows we have just about reached our last nerve and are about to strangle it, she hops up and finds parents of a newborn (there are always parents of newborns in restuaruants. I believe it is a law that there must be newborns in restaurants to complete that ambience necessary for Family Restaurants) and proceed to compliment the baby.

g.imp then trots back to us witha self-satisfied smile on her face. "Punish me now mom and dad! I dare you. Make me cry for those nice people who think I am the nicest, most well-mannered child they have ever seen! Go on! Dash their hopes!"

When g.imp sits down we usually offer her chips or lemonade. What else can we do?

Last night she added a new twist. She ran ahead to the Comfort Room and stood their waving at us. She needed mommy or daddy to wait outide the door for her. Sooo, daddy started over to man his post. Unfortunately another daddy felt the urge to utilize the facilities and beat me to the hall back to the Comfort Rooms. It was here that g.imp decided to jump out from around the corner and yell, "BOO!!"

Yes the poor man did jump and almost had a full-on bladder release!

We might never eat out again!

8 comments:

Mama of 2 said...

Oh Dennis that was priceless. Poor guy got the scare of his life did he?

That would be something Little Man would do and then be so embarrassed he wouldn't know what to say.

Aren't kids so much fun?

Diana said...

How funny! Poor guy! He probably made sure you guys were gone before coming back out...
*still laughing*

creative-Type Dad (Tony) said...

So this is what I'm looking forward to, huh?

dennis said...

mamaof2: Yes, but girl.imp was not the least bit fazed.

diana: he was in there an awful long time...

tony: there is no avoiding it either!

Rebecca said...

HAHAHAHAHA! Yeah, I seem to recall that kids and restaurants are rarely relaxing and enjoyable experiences. I think we ate alot of take-out back in the day. Its WAY easier.

Jenny said...

Ha! I just snorted from laughter.

All this awaits me in just a few years.

*ahem*

Suddenly it's not so funny.

dennis said...

rebecca: we talked about take-out and found we were more excited about oatmeal at home. Not wishing to sink that low, we went out.

jenny: It gets funnier...later.

radioactive girl said...

Just this morning my son hid in the closet and scared me so bad I thought I was going to cry. I feel for that guy!